Category Archives: Perky with Cancer

Fuzzy Chemo Hair

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by Christie Perkins

Technically I shouldn’t have wished for it.

You see my brother has this dog. It’s a very sweet dog. However, I’ve never snuggled it because I’m allergic to dogs and cats. But, claiming it was hypoallergenic, I gave in and scratched behind her ear.

And, immediately we became friends… and I fell in love with the dog.

So, here I am, watching the dog with a gamut of kids around it. They are all scratching her belly, behind her ear and neck and her eyes get all droopy, dazed; glazed. I think she is actually smiling.

Poor dog. Has to stand there all adorable looking and the kids are magnetized by her irresistible cuteness.

And that’s where I went wrong. For a brief moment I wished that I could be a dog (minus the dog food, of course). Continue reading →

Cancer Ate My Hair: Hungry Little Guy

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Losing Hair and Things and All the Blessings

by Christie Perkins

Yes. It’s true. I’ve joined the hair loss club. I’m president and I won by a landslide. (Hey when you still have bush lined parking lots for hair no one is going to elect you president. Sorry man.) Slick’s the trick.

Ok, so maybe not completely true… but balding men (and cancer groupies who have treatments that also ate their hair) I feel your pain. Yes. It’s gone. And though cancer ate my hair, no worries. The pain is only momentary.

Continue reading →

Worn Out Dilapidated Dolly To the Rescue

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by Christie Perkins

Wow. I’ve missed you. I’ve been on a couple of months of pain and sickness that I’ve just plain taken a break from the norm. I’m not really sure what that is anymore. Anyway, I’ve only been able to keep my head above water so most other things have just dropped. So much has happened.

But enough of that… let’s talk about life and living and all it’s wonderful perks.

I’ve been hoovering at a very hard and difficult state of well being for so long. I was tired of it. Tired of being sick, not having energy, throwing up every day, and generally not feeling great all the time. I was a dilapidated kinked-up crusty chromed car on the side of the road watching the freeway of Rolls Royce’s pass me by.

But I have not been without some amazing TLC. Of course there were so many helpful cleaners, home cooked beaners, and bright beaming gleamers that stopped to assist us. There’s been random money drops, sweet calls, and texts and visiting plops. I’ve cherished and needed them all.

But, through it all, I’ve felt so useless there being serviced and not helping anyone else. Continue reading →

IV Chemo Strikes Again. (A Grumpy Post.)

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by Christie Perkins

Three weeks ago my blood work showed that my tumor markers tripled in just a 2 month time period. We knew where my next treatments were heading (IV chemo. Yuck.) but we needed to take a cat scan first. Cat scan revealed the secrets of the blood work and that’s when I started watering my flowerpots with my eyes.

Hey. We’ve been on a drought restriction so sometimes you just gotta get creative. Except I think I drowned a few pots (ok, ok… I really didn’t but it would have been a really good idea. Why do all the good ideas come later?).

So the new news of more cancer growth on the spine and multiple spreading spots on my liver is hard to take. Magic potion number 9 wasn’t quite right for me. Above all, the thing that bothers me most is that I can’t quite catch my own grip on this news.

Stop crying girl.

Continue reading →

Finding Peace in Impossible Circumstances

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by Christie Perkins

My medical records now have a new permanent line: liver metastases. We wondered if we could just cut out the new tumors in the liver but the doctor says that it won’t do any good because with stage 4 cancer there are just cancer cells everywhere. We don’t ever really get rid of it we just try and keep it from spreading.

Oh yeah. That’s right.

Little factoid here: Breast cancer that has metastasized (stage 4 cancer) loves to travel to the bones, the ovaries, the brain, and the liver. I’ve eliminated the ovaries (neener-neener can’t catch me), checked the brain, and am already hosting a party in the bones, and now it’s in the liver.

But, don’t you stress now.

(We are trying to keep the cancer tourists from hearing about this new premium prime location- so shhhh! Don’t mention it.) It’s true, it’s not exactly the best news but the way I see it- they are just a few wimpy spots anyway. But the thing I can’t quite shake is the peace. Yeah, the peace. No matter what, it won’t leave me.

I like it. Continue reading →

How I Landed My Brain MRI; New Findings

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by Christie PErkiNS

This all started with my “trip” to  in Home Depot. I was just checking out lights. Luckily it was just my husband, me, and my random eyewitness that was on the aisle.

The floor was incredibly flat and smooth, not slick even a niche. Then poof! I dropped from eyesight. It’s like a magic trick. You know how tricks like this work: you see it, but you don’t.

How in the world can you fall on that? “That,” meaning nothing. I question my trick.

But, since my eyewitness was mentally documenting my fall and my husband had that quizzical look on his face I decided to fool them again. I pretended nothing happened. But the cock-eyed looks from the gents on the aisle made me splash out a smile, a chuckle, and a shrug.

Lets just forget that… moving along.

A couple of days later I’m in the granite store and we do a repeat trick. Wow. Fabulous moments going on here. Always getting the same quizzical look and silent words reverberate loud and clear in my ear…

What in the world?

My finale is always the same though: a smile, oops eyes, and a shrug. And the next several days I continue to fall when I walk. I trip on a thin cardboard box, the end of the broom- the straw fluffy-puff end, not the handle.

People begin booking my stunts. Continue reading →

The Mysterious Masked Ma’am

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by Christie Perkins

It’s not Halloween. Yet, she sports a mysterious mask. And, quite frankly, it doesn’t match her outfit. So what’s the deal?

the-mysterious-masked-maamYeah. Well. Thank you white blood cells. It’s official: my white blood cells have turned into couch potatoes.

The doc expected the cells to perform in a week and in two weeks they were still on vacation being lazy and making me a little stir crazy. So I decided to venture out. But of course I take my baby blue mask to filter out germs.

I miss human life forms.

I put it on and only my eyes lop over the top. Holy cow this is not what I was imagining. Couldn’t they make it slip just over the lips? I feel… noticeable (to say the least) as it covers my entire face. My makeup job this morning was a waste. Yay. But I wear lipstick anyway. It makes me feel better. This mask is fabulous for a back row kind of gal. Wow. Well. At least if I get lost I’ll have my SOS gear intact. Continue reading →

Neutropenia Plunk (And A Sweet Story of Love)

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by Christie Perkins

First off I must tell you that feel fine. I lack energy, but I always lack energy so it’s fine. I went to the doctor last week and got my results back from my cat scan. I’ve been feeling really good about it and rightfully so. I have found that for the most part it looks good. Nothing additional-tumorous to worry about. Yay!

I love emotional paydays.

neutropenia-kerplunkYet, my neutrophils are misbehaving. They’ve taken a plunk. So a little factoid here: normal range of neutrophils are between 2.5 and 6.0. Mine are a whopping 0.3 (yeah that’s zero point three). They call that neutropenia. (Puts your doctor in shock.)

It’s a bit lame as you get to evaluate your 4 walls while you wait for the neutrophils to get in order. Instead of me running amuck I’m stuck. I go lazy so they can go crazy. Meh. I avoid crowds, and germ infested guests, anyone with vaccinations (and carrying a live virus), and broccoli, cauliflower, and raspberries (because it’s difficult to wash thouroughly). So random right? And of course, I’ve been craving broccoli lately.

La-ti-dah. It’s a low key life when you are neutropenic. Continue reading →

How To Cross the Bridges of Tomorrow With Confidence

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by Christie Perkins

she-turned-to-the-sunlight-and-shook-her-yellow-headand-whispered-to-her-neighbor_-_winter-is-dead-4So let’s be honest here.

I woke up the day I was to take my chemo pill with dread. I felt my chemo creepy crawlies coming on the few days before. The anticipation of the unknown was blown up in my mind. The list of possible side effects haunted and taunted me. And I knew that my life was crossing onto new and permanent territory.

I had to cross this bridge.

You see, up until this point the perks of my current life were highlighted and blaring in neon signs in my mind. They were good signs. Which of those signs would burn out when I crossed the bridge? Continue reading →

Chemo Pill and Death of a Grapefruit

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by Christie Perkins

First they tell me I can’t have blue cheese dressing. It would have been fine if they would Chemo Pill and Death of a Grapfruithave told me that the year before. I wouldn’t have even tried the mouth watering crave. Yes. I was like all of y’all scrunching my nose at the thought of moldy cheese. But, at first lick it pleased me and I fell in love with it. Thanks Dad. I should have trusted you the first time you tried to get me to try it. I should have known because I’ve inherited my dad’s taste buds on many other things.

(Seriously if you haven’t tried it you’re missing out.)

So with my initial cancer diagnosis and the start up of chemo I’m a little bummed about ditching my newfound infatuation, I had to break up with blue cheese. Those of you on weird food diets get my pain. I had to settle for ranch to avoid an elevated health crash. Continue reading →